I had a fun near miss at the gas station this morning

"Textured Soy Protein" (texturedsoyprotein)
05/06/2016 at 10:52 • Filed to: None

Today I stopped to fill up my tank on my way to work. It was an interesting experience involving a girl in a stick shift Mk6 Jetta with a bunch of crap inside. Why do I know this girl’s car was full of trash? Read on!

When I pulled up at the pump behind this Jetta, she had already put the fuel filler nozzle in her tank, and then I heard the gas station attendant say over the intercom, “Pump 5, all our pumps are pre-pay, please hang up the pump and swipe your card.” Jetta girl either didn’t understand or didn’t quite hear what the attendant guy said, so she started walking inside. I told her the guy said to hang up the pump and swipe the card.

As I started to pump my gas, I heard the guy in a Madison Gas & Electric truck in the next aisle say, “ma’am, your car is rolling.” He didn’t do anything more about this, mind you, but I looked forward and sure enough the Jetta was rolling away!

Seeing the Zoolander gasoline fight flash through my mind, I sprinted toward the Jetta, as did its owner, who started hopping in the driver seat.

Just in case, I opened the passenger door, but I didn’t want to invade this girl’s space, so I told her to grab the parking brake, which she did. She backed up her car, thanked me, and said “I’m not normally this much of a space cadet!”

This is actually the second time I’ve seen my life, and the Zoolander gasoline fight, flash before my eyes. The last time was when a person in front of me pumped gas, left the nozzle in their tank, turned on their car, and started to drive away. I ran towards them and screamed about the nozzle still in their car, which in hindsight maybe wasn’t the best thing to do from a self-preservation standpoint, but hey at least they stopped.

DISCUSSION (33)

Chris_K_F drives an FR-Slow > Textured Soy Protein
05/06/2016 at 10:59

But was she cute?

StingrayJake > Chris_K_F drives an FR-Slow
05/06/2016 at 11:02

She used the term “space cadet” so I’m going to guess she’s probably on the nerdy side. Or her parents were nerds. Who the hell still uses “space cadet?”

CalzoneGolem > StingrayJake
05/06/2016 at 11:04

You got a nicer way of phrasing that?

StingrayJake > CalzoneGolem
05/06/2016 at 11:07

My comment or an alternative to “space cadet?”

Ash78, voting early and often > Chris_K_F drives an FR-Slow
05/06/2016 at 11:10

Seriously, these are the kind of stories that get told at weddings and anniversaries for decades to come. But leave the Zoolander analogy out. That will just date the story.

CalzoneGolem > StingrayJake
05/06/2016 at 11:10

An alternative to space cadet.

StingrayJake > CalzoneGolem
05/06/2016 at 11:13

Out of it. Absent minded. Brain fart. Blanked. Airhead. Ditz.

Space cadet is just a really old term. I’ve never heard it outside of a movie set in the 50s or 60s (and a Pink Floyd song).

Textured Soy Protein > Chris_K_F drives an FR-Slow
05/06/2016 at 11:14

I chose not to comment on her appearance because I figured the female members here wouldn’t appreciate that non-relevant detail being added to the story. Just saying.

Sneaky Pete > Textured Soy Protein
05/06/2016 at 11:14

I’m guessing she way a dirty hippie. Amirite?

Also, all that would’ve happened (to the gas pump, anyway) was the emergency disconnect would have...well, disconnected. She would’ve had to pay for a new one. It’s engineered to break away due the the stupidity of the general public.

Textured Soy Protein > Sneaky Pete
05/06/2016 at 11:16

She was wearing workout clothes that I can only assume were recently washed.

Chris_K_F drives an FR-Slow > StingrayJake
05/06/2016 at 11:16

I like nerdy girls. haha

Chris_K_F drives an FR-Slow > Textured Soy Protein
05/06/2016 at 11:17

It’s incredibly relevant! Well, relevant to my interests at least. lol

Chris_K_F drives an FR-Slow > Ash78, voting early and often
05/06/2016 at 11:18

Precisely.

MonkeePuzzle > Textured Soy Protein
05/06/2016 at 11:19

I’m confused... did you get the digits or not? this is for sure a “how we met” story

StingrayJake > Chris_K_F drives an FR-Slow
05/06/2016 at 11:20

I married a non-nerdy girl. But she’d certainly qualify as a space cadet at times.

ESSSIX GmbH - Accountant/Wagon Thumper > Textured Soy Protein
05/06/2016 at 11:21

Fuck that. People are beautiful or they are not. And the nots need to just face the facts.

I may or may not be one of the nots.. my wifey thinks I’m hot so w/e.

Textured Soy Protein > MonkeePuzzle
05/06/2016 at 11:21

I’m already happily engaged and my fiancee keeps the inside of her car clean.

Chris_K_F drives an FR-Slow > StingrayJake
05/06/2016 at 11:22

I’m dating a relatively non-nerdy girl, but working on that. Since dating me she has seen Episodes 4-7 of Star Wars. It’s a major step forward. haha

MontegoMan562 is a Capri RS Owner > Textured Soy Protein
05/06/2016 at 11:23

While it’s a pain in the ass for the gas stations, all hoses are quick detach these days, even if it was actively filling it’ll shut off when ripped from the pump.

Don’t worry too much about the gas fight....unless you literally have a gas fight.

Textured Soy Protein > ESSSIX GmbH - Accountant/Wagon Thumper
05/06/2016 at 11:30

How would knowing what she looks like change anything about this story? Even her gender doesn’t matter I could just as easily have said “person” and it would’ve been the same story.

There aren’t a ton of women here on Oppo but I’ve read enough of their valid complaints about the occasional chauvinism that happens here (and I’ve seen) that I decided to not say anything about her appearance because it doesn’t really matter to this story.

OPPOsaurus WRX > Textured Soy Protein
05/06/2016 at 11:37

“I’m not normally this much of a space cadet!”

i call bullshit, this is probably just another day for her.

Rainbow > Textured Soy Protein
05/06/2016 at 11:44

I used to work at a gas station and had someone drive off with the hose once. There wasn’t a single drop spilled, though, because they have pretty great safety features. You would have been fine. I’m sure it would spill some if it happened while pumping, though, but it would shut itself off as soon as the hose disconnected.

StingrayJake > Chris_K_F drives an FR-Slow
05/06/2016 at 11:46

Oh lord my wife refuses to watch the first six Star Wars movies. She actually liked 7, but she didn’t originally want to go with me. Only reason she saw it was because her entire office went to watch it.

Rainbow > OPPOsaurus WRX
05/06/2016 at 11:46

Or maybe she’s super high and literally thinks she’s a space cadet refueling her rocket ship.

Chris_K_F drives an FR-Slow > StingrayJake
05/06/2016 at 11:47

Yeah, I convinced my girlfriend to watch 4-6 because 7 was coming out. She didn’t love them, but said she can definitely understand why people like them so much. She did really like 7 though.

Xyl0c41n3 > Textured Soy Protein
05/06/2016 at 11:49

And you’re absolutely right about that. It’s entirely irrelevant to the story. But all the comments here asking if you flirted/got her number/how hot she is remind me again of why Oppo can be so frustrating sometimes.

Thanks for the post (seriously).

I think the worst I’ve ever done myself is forget to twist the gas cap back on and close the little door. Now I drive a car with a capless tank, and I love it so very much. :)

ESSSIX GmbH - Accountant/Wagon Thumper > Textured Soy Protein
05/06/2016 at 11:53

Lol my point is, it doesnt matter, but browny points are always awarded for saving the damsel in distress.

Here we were looking for the level of damsel to properly award points.

Judging appearances is something we’re all hard wired to do, since the eyes were put on the front of our faces.

BOTH MEN AND WOMEN DO THIS, men just like to talk about it more publicly. jeez

Xyl0c41n3 > StingrayJake
05/06/2016 at 11:58

I do?

StingrayJake > Xyl0c41n3
05/06/2016 at 12:17

Would you consider yourself a bit on the nerdy side? ;)

Xyl0c41n3 > StingrayJake
05/06/2016 at 12:25

I’d consider myself on the fucking awesome side. :)

StingrayJake > Xyl0c41n3
05/06/2016 at 12:38

Aren’t we all!

Textured Soy Protein > ESSSIX GmbH - Accountant/Wagon Thumper
05/06/2016 at 12:49

I can see how if I were single I could parlay this into asking her out, if I were inclined. But I’m happily engaged to and live with my fiancee who I’ve been with for five and a half years. So really, my only thought process was stopping the car from rolling away. I would’ve done the same thing whether it was Gisele or a 500 lb dude.

Shour, Aloof and Obnoxious > Textured Soy Protein
05/07/2016 at 18:54

I *LOVE* that you proved the awesome-level of your fiancee by pointing out how neat she keeps her ride.